Laura Espósto

                    for Colten Boushie

Know this has everything to do with you The cold slap to the back of the neck my grandfather took for yours You’re far away now A southern countryside away you are laying a midwest girl down across the stretching lawn Pain is a nerve resonating this distance I feel it every time I look in the bathroom mirror and account for the eyes of devouring / blue wide open / staring back I’d jam them down the drain if my questions weren’t already answered Know this has nothing to do with you It was Eisenhower who said Why can’t they just give up and die He was a man just like you are Maybe he acted in the only way he knew how So it is best if you stand witness This is not a Western film there is no bleeding sunset in which you / the hero / can reconcile yourself to Consider where you stand How your legs refuse to hold an unjust weight whether it be gun or stomach or climbing rope I miss my father and his children If you find them for me maybe I’ll let you back into the house I’ll let you understand what it means to come home I’ll let you crawl around under the front porch with me until you find what has or has not been eaten of their bodies You can’t miss their light / the land grappled / to their feet Their faces bang in my mind today It is best if you don’t stand at all This is the short way of saying get on your knees and beg


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