Oh, Patriarchy, you dicknozzle, stop assigning all the women to work in the Garden Center. You think we are nothing but fruit & flower. That we have nothing better to do than compete with each other. Like it matters who can smother the most poppies. Or who can invent the dirtiest, raunchiest floral names. Or who has the sexiest voice over the PA. Please. It’s busy work to distract us from unionizing. But you can’t stop the beat. Mary & Medusa have become best friends & they gang up on frienemy Eve who won’t acknowledge her sexist existence. But that is a narrative for another time. The M&Ms keep sending Eve baskets of apples, an application for the produce section, apple tree seeds disguised as coffee grinds. Those hardcore bitches. So tired of the men who spilt them open like melons & seeded them with pomegranates & expectation. Oh, boo hoo, Medusa says to Eve. They think you’re weak, poor you. But then she takes it back. You’re right, she says, I’d rather be evil. Medusa sends her trained snakes to hiss & whisper to Eve as she sleeps. Aren’t you hungry, hungry, hungry. One white pill, one blue. You think Mary is the nice one; that’s what you intended. But she holds her reputation against Eve. Look, Mary says, they think I was a virgin. Who’s purer than me? No one knows about the men I took between my knees. No one cares about biology except when showing the inferiority of women. Mary & Medusa think we should all form a girl gang with Lilith & Delilah. After all, we all oppose the same overlord.