Dear Donald,
What's good? Big fan here from way back in your
Derrick Comedy days, black boy, big-city adjacent
just like you, like you a corny dude turned, well,
kind of cool on the cusp of 30-odd years running
in less the perfect circles, Billy Dee Williams cool
but watered down a bit like Kool-Aid for diabetics
at the cookout who still desire a little sweetness
in their lives, so when I jot down “how are you?”
right here, on this page, know I really mean that
as if we’re already familial. I mean, get your money,
black man! I dig it, I bang with the track honestly,
but tell me what life is now that you've actually got
real cheddar, a sum you can spread over the rest of
your days, and your children’s, like butter that we
can't help but believe in. Obama butter, if you will.
Something real that used to be just an unattainable
idea. That’s America wherever you are but this is
America over here, also, and it doesn’t always feel
so good; I don’t feel so good, my stomach slowly
turning to stone, and I bet you can understand why.
There’s a lot of long days, a lot of hard questions
pointed at the back of my head as the gun is to
the guitarist’s in your most viral video, his dome
bagged in a burlap sack or something, your eyes
so big and so scary and so damn scared (to me),
your hair unruly and probably breaking all kinds
of combs as if laws of possession, but that scene
is only one small America, and one that's kind of
a myth: black-on-black propagandist magic but
with the wires still visible everywhere. And that
brings me to the point in the video when the choir
is caught up in the spirit as they’re supposed to be
and then sprayed with bullets by way of your own
prodigiously talented hands: help me process that,
please. Charleston is my last name so we don’t need
to rehash the allusion at all, but damn. If there was
any point it shouldn’t have been you it was that one;
if there was any point it shouldn’t have been us —
it was that one. You’ve given me the glorious gift
of Atlanta and gave me a migraine with that stunt,
which somehow even shortchanged shock value
since I didn’t see a single white person have to duck
shots during the whole video. And I do appreciate
the risk associated with that idea, not as an artist, but
as a brand, a man with bills to pay I probably can’t
even fathom. I, too, have to rewind and watch back
what I say before I say it, daydream the whole sorry
scene where I get escorted out of the building with
carceral bracelets chaffing my smooth wrists. Still,
my disappointment stands given how frequently I’ve
stanned for you through the mixtape years batting
back many a side-eye, before the tag of genius was
put on you by the masses left comfortably in the lie
of their lives by a choice to keep the burden of blood
entirely on us, the burden of national reckoning on us,
which I want to say is because you knew we could
handle it, that we could take it because we’re always
taking it, but if there’s any credibility left in the word
brilliant in this era of easy superlatives and hot takes,
you should’ve known we were fed up. You should’ve
known, Bino. You probably did and then did anyway,
but we don’t have the time for that, not these days.
Because this is America: can’t have us slippin’ up.
about the author