Self Portrait with a Line from Black Panther
“Bury me in the ocean with my ancestors that jumped from the ships because they knew death was better than bondage” — Erik Killmonger, Black Panther
when I am more channel than full stop
more conduit than opening
both waif and water witch
when I have been hollowed and struck
been the gazelle killed and resurrected
as drum my skin pulled taught
across brittle bones and the rage of my mothers
and my mothers’ mothers sounding with each blow
my flesh rotting quietly from the inside out
when I have been both instrument and tune
and learned grief how it can work its fingers
along the chords of a throat and split the sky in song
in invitation to the spirits to draw near
when I have walked alone in the surf —
the atlantic a dark dancing mass before me
the waves extending to kiss my ankles
my feet sinking deeper and deeper into the sand
the free people of that sunken city reaching out to answer
to pull me closer to call me home
when I am just a child of ancestors
of the drowned of the voyage from hell into hell
when there is nothing left but to wade into the water —
troubles rolling from my skin to salt the sea
the wind shaking my hair the setting sun in my teeth
a warm and gentle farewell
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